#Trust30 Day 18 – Dreaming (again)

[Another #Trust30 post...For more information about why I’m writing them, click here].

Abide in the simple and noble regions of thy life, obey thy heart. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Write down your top three dreams. Now write down what’s holding you back from them. –Michael Rad

A lot of these prompts seem to have similar thoughts or messages. I have tried to come up with something a little different for each one to keep them interesting. Three of my top dreams are:

Number 1 – Take an around-the-world voyage, hitting six continents on one trip

There are a few different obstacles to this one. First, it is difficult to afford this type of a trip (although I have found many good ideas to make this type of travel much more affordable through the Travel Hacking Cartel). Second, planning the trip will be a headache. It is not easy to hit six continents at one time without a good plan. Third, to be worth it, a trip like this must be at least two months (three to six months would be better) and I find it difficult to imagine taking two young kids on such an adventure. This one might have to wait a couple years.

Number 2 – Have a second home somewhere on the Mediterranean

Again, the primary obstacle for this one is financial. However, I do not need to have some huge house to be satisfied, so this might be much more affordable than it appears. I envision a small apartment, just big enough for the family, with enough space for the occasional short-term visitor. We have a friend with a small apartment in Galicia that serves as a model for this dream. It is just a regular apartment, with a couple bedrooms and a small kitchen, but it made the perfect place for some rest and recovery one time when we badly needed it. There will also be some logistical issues that make this one difficult, but when the time comes, I expect to be able to overcome them.

Number 3 – Write a book

I already discussed this one in an earlier #Trust30 post, but I will repeat it anyway. The obstacles are the following: First, I need to overcome the resistance to sit down and outline the entire book so that I know what exactly I need to write. Second, I need to make the time to write it. I am working to overcome this one by setting a more regular writing schedule. In addition, I also need to make sure that I do the important work that is not urgent (see Stephen Covey’s The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People for more explanation of that concept), so I need to make sure to keep the book as a priority. It is a big commitment and I need to follow through on it.

Weekly update: Like I thought it might be, this was a difficult week for writing about coffee. I even missed the Friday coffee links page (we’ll have “late links” this week). I have a few coffee articles in the works that I need to finish, but because there was no fixed deadline for them, I pushed them back to do other tasks (like #Trust30 posts). It looks to be a busy weekend.

#Trust30 Day 17 – Head in the Clouds

A man should learn to detect and watch that gleam of light which flashes across his mind from within, more than the lustre of the firmament of bards and sages. Yet he dismisses without notice his thought, because it is his. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

My favorite quote of all time is Alan Kay: ‘In order to predict the future, you have to invent it.’ I am all about inventing the future. Decide what you want the future to be and make it happen. Because you can. Write about your future now. – Cindy Gallop

Here’s a snapshot from the future. It’s fun to dream.

I foresee a future full of many journeys and even more words. I see myself using words to paint pictures of soft summer sunsets and billowy clouds drifting lazily overhead as they resist the collective call of the people to go away(!) for the summer.

I see myself getting up at six in the morning and sauntering out to my balcony overlooking a quiet street in a seaside city. I quickly eat a light breakfast, then sit down to labor out a few thousand words before my brain needs a break. When the energy runs out, I stop, put the laptop away and take a short walk down the street to have a cup of coffee and read the paper. After an hour of relaxation, I head back to my perch on the balcony, where I would once again pick up the story. If words do not come, I take out a sheet of paper and a ballpoint pen and scribble out something—a new character, villainous and immoral, or a picturesque landscape, a place where the heroine could not help but be happy and beautiful.

With the mechanisms of creation turning out words once again, I spend several more hours developing these characters and the lives they lead. They have become dear to me, and they would be dear to others too, if only they knew them as well as I do.

They say a good length for a first novel is around 100,000 words. That sounds like a lot, but really it is very few, especially if you want people to know how much life your characters have.

I will write—and will not stop writing—until the words which have built up inside me for so many years have run out. It might not be in my lifetime, for there were many years when I watched and listened and said very little.

I will write to solidify my own thoughts and perspectives, which slowly shift like the ground over a sunken spring.

I will learn to write without using too much alliteration.

When I am tired, I will be careful not to write too much, for the words tend to ramble on without direction.

I will not be afraid to try new things, even if they might not be understood by everyone.

And I will never forget to somehow tie the end to the beginning, even when there appears to be no strong bond between the two.

Click. The shutter is closed.

#Trust 30 Day 16 – Wonder and Awe

[Another #Trust30 post...For more information, click here].

When good is near you, when you have life in yourself, it is not by any known or accustomed way; you shall not discern the foot-prints of any other; you shall not see the face of man; you shall not hear any name;—— the way, the thought, the good, shall be wholly strange and new. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Can you remember a moment in your life when you had life in yourself and it was wholly strange and new? Can you remember the moment when you stopped walking a path of someone else, and started cutting your own? Write about that moment. And if you haven’t experienced it yet, let the miracle play out in your mind’s eye and write about that moment in your future.” –Bridget Pilloud

One such moment in my life happened nearly a decade ago, on a delayed honeymoon to Europe. It began in Italy—Rome, actually—in the fall of 2001.

We were two kids from the country, recently married, exploring the Eternal City. Neither of us were experienced travelers, at least not compared to what we would become, and Rome made a lasting impression on us.

Rome is a city where the past and present are so intertwined you cannot separate them. I remember walking around looking at the monuments in the ancient Roman Forum and at the Vatican, marveling not only at their ages, but also at the history that had occurred in and around them.

Each day we saw something new, often built on top of something that was very old. We tried new foods and explored new parts of a city that had been explored many, many times before. It didn’t matter that we weren’t the first ones to meet Rome—the city easily accommodates new visitors, welcoming them to view the foundations of Western civilization.

At the time, the world was before us and the opportunities seemed unlimited. That may be why the trip was such a significant event to us—the sense of adventure is a powerful stimulant.

What made the trip more memorable was that we arrived in Rome in the first hours of September 10, 2001, on a journey that would keep us away from home for several months. It was a strange time to be abroad, yet it was wonderfully magical. The events back home that fall served to engrave the memories more deeply into our minds.

I remember taking a train eastward out of Rome in the late afternoon one day, watching the sun set over the rolling hills of the Italian countryside. Through the windows of the train, you could see the small hilltop towns and villages with their fortifying walls that protected them from medieval invaders a thousand years before. The valleys were cut up into small fields bordered by aging oak trees and old stone fences. The occasional castle, hewn from grayish brown stone, jutted up from the earth, reminding us of stories of battles fought for land and for honor. To this day I remember that ride with a wistful heart that longs to replicate such an adventure. It changed me, profoundly.

It is difficult for me to recall another time when life seemed so “wholly strange and new,” and as I look back upon it, it reminds me to approach each day knowing that it is possible to live a life filled with a sense of wonder and awe.

#Trust30 Day 15

[We're halfway through the #Trust30 challenge...This is what it is].

Do your work, and I shall know you. Do your work, and you shall reinforce yourself. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Take a moment, step back from your concerns, and focus on one thing: You have one life to achieve everything you’ve ever wanted. Sounds simple, but when you really focus on it, let it seep into your consciousness, you realize you only have about 100 years to get every single thing you’ve ever wanted to do. No second chances. This is your only shot. Suddenly, this means you should have started yesterday. No more waiting for permission or resources to start. Today is the day you make the rest of your life happen. Write down one thing you’ve always wanted to do and how you will achieve that goal. Don’t be afraid to be very specific in how you’ll achieve it: once you start achieving, your goals will get bigger and your capability to meet them will grow.”—Colin Wright

Someday, I want to build my own acoustic guitar. I really know nothing about what it takes to make one, so I am going to have to find some help. I will start by reading a book or two about the process, so that when it comes time to talk to someone about it, I will know what questions to ask. Then I will either take a class at a community college or find a luthier who is willing to teach me.

At this point, I do not have the tools or space to make one, so I will have to buy/borrow/rent the tools to undertake the project. If I am in Portland when I undertake the project, I will look at joining one of the community workshops around the city, where people can bring in materials and use the tools to shape them into finished projects.

The guitar will probably have a conventional design, much like a Taylor or Martin guitar. I’m sure I will put some type of signature art in it, but above all, I want it to have a unique tone. For me, tone is the most important part of a guitar.

One of the reasons I want to make a guitar is because I think that building something using real materials is fulfilling. These days, I spend most of my time in front of a computer screen, which can be tiring on both the eyes and the mind.

Making a guitar is a project that I could do that would require learning a whole new set of skills. It is challenging, tactile and full of real sensory experiences. I could easily see my progress toward the finish, and when I got done, I would have something useful to show for my efforts, something I would enjoy for years to come.

#Trust30 Day 14 - Ambition

[Yes, there are a lot of these #Trust30 posts...here's why].

When good is near you, when you have life in yourself, it is not by any known or accustomed way; you shall not discern the foot-prints of any other; you shall not see the face of man; you shall not hear any name; the way, the thought, the good, shall be wholly strange and new. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

“The world buzzes about goals and visions. Focus. Create a vivid picture of exactly where you want to go. Dream big, then don’t let anything or anyone stop you. The problem, as Daniel Gilbert wrote in Stumbling Upon Happiness, is that we’re horrible at forecasting how we’ll really feel 10 or 20 years from now – once we’ve gotten what we dreamed of. Often, we get there only to say, “That’s not what I thought it would be,” and ask, “What now?” Ambition is good. Blind ambition is not. It blocks out not only distraction, but the many opportunities that might take you off course but that may also lead you in a new direction. Consistent daily action is only a virtue when bundled with a willingness to remain open to the unknown. In this exercise, look at your current quest and ask, “What alternative opportunities, interpretations and paths am I not seeing?” They’re always there, but you’ve got to choose to see them.” - Jonathan Fields

The author’s prompt does not quite fit my situation. I do not have a “blind ambition” that causes me to miss opportunities that I would otherwise see. Rather, I am too open to possibilities, and the reluctance to choose a more focused approach to life is creating challenges for me. There are too many distractions in my world, not too few.

However, even though the prompt is not perfect for my situation,  I am still willing to sit down and think about the ‘alternate paths’ I might not be seeing. Some of these could be:

1. Writing for a magazine or other publication
2. Start an international coffee newsletter, to combine my interests in coffee, travel, writing, business, economics and storytelling
3. Turn this site into more of a demonstration of my capabilities and let people know how they can hire me (building logos, graphics, creating presentations, speaking, editing videos, etc.)
4. Try to find a “normal” job that allows me to travel and write about those travels when not working for the company
5. Contracting with a company to write/oversee its newsletters, either internal or external

One alternative (#2 above) for what I am doing would be to create a newsletter for the coffee industry that is different from the coffee trade magazines. [side note: If you are someone who is in the coffee industry, is there some type of information out there that you are missing that you would like to have available? My crack team of researchers could start working on finding it.] I heard a marketing professor say one time that to be successful, you have to find a problem and be the solution to that problem. In other words, you find someone with a headache and then be the aspirin.

My current ‘quest’ is to make a living out of writing and other creative activities. I would like to turn Caffeinated PDX into a more important and useful site for visitors, but that is going to require some changes (and, eventually, some assistance). The blog is going to have to have a stronger message to attract more people and it also will need to grow outside the Portland area.

In essence, the current Caffeinated PDX is a first draft for the project it will eventually become. During the last several months, I have learned a lot about coffee, writing, blogging and social media. I continually remind myself that it takes time to build something successful, and that even on the days when it seems like my progress goes backwards, I am learning things that will be valuable in the long run. At some point, I will find the right mix of message and utility, and then use my “not so blind” ambition to make it work.

Trust30 Day 13 – Surprise yourself

[Want to know more about these #Trust30 posts? Click here]

I will not hide my tastes or aversions. I will so trust that what is deep is holy, if we follow the truth, it will bring us out safe at last. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Think of a time when you didn’t think you were capable of doing something, but then surprised yourself.  How will you surprise yourself this week?” –Ashley Ambirge

This question brings back a memory of a time during my sophomore year at college when I had gotten a little behind in my classes. I was still passing all of them, but was struggling to keep up with the material and assignments. It seemed like everything I did was at the last minute and all of my assignments were being finished just in time (JIT). JIT is a good system if you are a manufacturer, but not if you are a student.

I specifically remember one Sunday when I  had to write a paper that was due the next day. I hadn’t even started the research, and I remember thinking there was no way I was going to get it done. At that time, I didn’t write as much as I do now, so I was really slow. It took me forever to write anything and because I was slow, I didn’t like writing. Sitting there staring at a page was intimidating and I hated it.

If I could have, I probably would have put off working on the paper for another day, but there was no way out of it. The paper was due the next day and the teacher wasn’t taking late assignments.

Shortly after lunch, I drove my car to the library. I drove slowly, dreading the next several hours and thinking of how I would be imprisoned in the library all afternoon. To make matters worse, it was a beautiful spring day with lots of sunshine. Warm spring days were a rarity in Pullman, so it was doubly depressing to be headed for the library. There was no way around it though, so into the library I went.

The paper came together gradually, but it wasn’t easy. Around midnight, I went to the computer lab to type the paper. I was nearly finished at 1:00am when my computer froze. My heart did too. Oh, no. I didn’t have it backed up on a disk either. I buried my face in my hands. All of that work—down the drain. A tangle of nausea grew inside my stomach. I was already exhausted and ready to go home and get some sleep. The deep sense of dread grew stronger as I hit the reset button on the machine.

Miraculously (and I mean miraculously), when the computer restarted, my paper reappeared too. It was just sitting on the screen as if nothing had happened. If you had been watching me, you probably would have seen a look of complete disbelief pass over my face before tears of joy filled my eyes. Talk about relief!

I quickly backed the file up, not wanting a repeat of the heart-stopping drama. Half an hour later, I finished the last few edits and printed it out. It wasn’t the best paper in the history of my time at Washington State, but in my mind, it was certainly one of the most memorable. Although the incident did not help me break away from my JIT system, I did come away with a new confidence that I could pull together something at the last minute if I had to, which was a pretty good lesson to learn.

[This week, with visitors coming into town for a few days, I’m going to surprise myself if I get three good articles written for the blog in addition to these #Trust30 posts. Check back to see how it goes.] 

#Trust 30 Day 12

[To find out why I am writing all these #Trust30 posts, click here]

These are the voices which we hear in solitude, but they grow faint and inaudible as we enter into the world. Society everywhere is in conspiracy against the manhood of every one of its members. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Is fear holding you back from living your fullest life and being truly self expressed? Put yourself in the shoes of the you who’s already lived your dream and write out the answers to the following:

Is the insecurity you’re defending worth the dream you’ll never realize? or the love you’ll never venture? or the joy you’ll never feel?

Will the blunder matter in 10 years? Or 10 weeks? Or 10 days? Or 10 minutes?

Can you be happy being anything less than who you really are?

Now Do. The Thing. You Fear.” –Lachlan Cotter

Another day, another similar prompt. This is getting a little redundant.

Is fear holding you back from living your fullest life and being truly self expressed?

On some levels, yes. I am working through it though. That is one reason I write.

The question that keeps me awake at night is, if I really want to be “truly self-expressed,” what is going to make it financially possible?

Here’s an example of what I mean. I read someone else’s #trust30 post today that described the rules of a game called “Spin the Globe,” where you take a well-oiled globe, give it a good spin and have a friend close his eyes and stop the globe with a finger. If the finger stops on a country or island, you have seven days to make arrangements and travel there. What a game! Unfortunately for the guy who wrote the post, the game was only theoretical. In his comments section, he admitted that it wasn’t real because he did not know how to pay for it.

Is the insecurity you’re defending worth the dream you’ll never realize? Probably not. While money is important, if it were the real obstacle, I could find a way to get it.

Will the blunder matter in 10 years? Only if the blunder is to not go for it.

Can you be happy being anything less than who you really are? Truly happy? No. Happy enough? I hope not.