#Trust30 Day 11 – Imitation is what?

[To find out why I am writing all these #Trust30 posts, click here]

Imitation is Suicide. Insist on yourself; never imitate. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Write down in which areas of your life you have to overcome these suicidal tendencies of imitation, and how you can transform them into a newborn you – one that doesn’t hide its uniqueness, but thrives on it. There is a “divine idea which each of us represents” – which is yours?” –Fabian Kruse (the Friendly Anarchist)

Emerson’s quote is a pretty absolute statement. By trying to be someone else, you lose yourself, and you might as well no longer be alive. The great ones know this. They are inimitable, with a style that sets them apart. As soon as Elvis opens his mouth to sing, you know who it is.

The concept reminds me of learning to play the guitar. At one time in my life, I aspired to be a musician. I spent hours trying to play songs in the same way that Eric Clapton and others did. I grew frustrated when I couldn’t reproduce the sounds I heard. My fingers moved too slowly, my tone was not clean enough and eventually I gave up trying.

Looking back, I would approach music very differently.

Click to read more ...

#Trust30 Day 10 - Message from a soapbox

[Today we have arrived at 1/3 of the way through the challenge! It's been fun so far, but exhausting too. To find out why I am writing all these #Trust30 posts, click here]

Mr. Ralph Waldo Emerson’s quote:

To believe your own thought, to believe that what is true for you in your private heart is true for all men, that is genius. 

Mr. Eric Handler’s prompt:

What is burning deep inside of you? If you could spread your personal message RIGHT NOW to 1 million people, what would you say?

[Let’s see…a million people….I would tell everyone to click on my ads….Wait, just kidding. . . Dear Google, I was only trying to be funny. . . It was a joke! Don’t banish me! Aaaaagggghhhh!]

The real message: Just because someone tells you it’s true, doesn’t mean it is. Be skeptical when you talk to people who are completely convinced, without any doubts, that they have the right answers—even if you agree with them. There is a lot more gray in this world than many are willing to admit.

Never lose your ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes. You might find that your adversary has a good point, if you are willing to actually listen to what he or she is saying.

Click to read more ...

#Trust30 - Day 9 - Too scary?

[To find out why I am writing all these #Trust30 posts, click here]

Today's Quote:

The other terror that scares us from self-trust is our consistency; a reverence for our past act or word, because the eyes of others have no other data for computing our orbit than our past acts, and we are loath to disappoint them. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

And the Prompt:

Emerson says: “Always do what you are afraid to do.” What is ‘too scary’ to write about? Try doing it now. – Mary Jaksch

Hmm. It’s one thing to answer a question like this in private, with your best friend or confidant, but when you start expecting me to write about something like that in this space, I begin to question my wisdom in accepting this writing challenge.

Some of the things that are “too scary” to write about are things best kept in confidence. At least they are things that I am not ready to share in a public forum. However, I will try to give you something, because you have been kind enough to come here to read this.

*thinking*

It took a while, but after staring at this screen until the white page permanently stained my retinae, I found my topic: love.

Click to read more ...

#Trust30 - Day 8 - A look back

[To find out why I am writing all these #Trust30 posts, click here]

The prompt:

What would you say to the person you were five years ago? What will you say to the person you’ll be in five years? - Corbett Barr

Before I start answering, could I talk to the person from 10 or 15 years ago too?

I try to not look back on things too much, because looking back like that can fill your mind with too many ifs, as in “if only I had….” You can see all of the mistakes you made and what you could have done differently. Five years ago, I was living in Boston, trying to figure out my new job requirements at Starbucks. It was the first time I had worked in customer service, and it opened my eyes about service jobs. Fortunately, I had a great group of people to work with and it was a great experience (everyone should have to work in food service at some point in their lives. It would give us all a lesson on how to treat others. For the most part, the customers were great, but there were those who—to be nice—weren’t. They had forgotten that baristas (or waiters, waitresses, bartenders, etc.) are there to serve them, not be their servants. It is a huge difference).

There are definitely a few things I would say to that me. I would tell that other self that when life throws you a curve, don’t panic. Don’t get in any rush to change what you are doing. You can figure it out. Go after your dreams with everything you have and ask others for help when you need it, because people are willing to help you, if they know you want it. If you don’t ask, they won’t know.

And to the person I am in five years:

I persevered, and succeeded.

[Question: Do you think it is valuable to look back at your life in this way? Does it help you figure out where you are going today?]

#Trust30 - Day 7 - Big goals

[To find out why I am writing all these #Trust30 posts, click here]

Here's the prompt, from Matt Cheuvront:

“Next to Resistance, rational thought is the artist or entrepreneurs worst enemy. Bad things happen when we employ rational thought, because rational thought comes from the ego. Instead, we want to work from the Self, that is, from instinct and intuition, from the unconscious. A child has no trouble believing the unbelievable, nor does the genius or the madman. Its only you and I, with our big brains and our tiny hearts, who doubt and overthink and hesitate.” - Steven Pressfield, Do the Work

The idea of “being realistic” holds all of us back. From starting a business or quitting a job to dating someone who may not be our type or moving to a new place – getting “real” often means putting your dreams on hold.

Today, let’s take a step away from rational thought and dare to be bold. What’s one thing you’ve always wanted to accomplish but have been afraid to pursue? Write it down. Also write down the obstacles in your way of reaching your goal. Finally, write down a tangible plan to overcome each obstacle.

The only thing left is to, you know, actually go make it happen. What are you waiting for?

There were lots of things I could have chosen, but I only have time to write about one.

Click to read more ...

#Trust30-Day 6

Today’s prompt, from Jonathan Mead:

If you had one week left to live, would you still be doing what you’re doing now? In what areas of your life are you preparing to live? Take them off your To Do list and add them to a To Stop list. Resolve to only do what makes you come alive.

Bonus: How can your goals improve the present and not keep you in a perpetual “always something better” spiral?

Another “time is short” prompt…Hopefully, we’ll get a little more variety this week. These type of questions do give you an opportunity to reflect, but I’m ready for a change in topic.

To answer the first question—no. Of course I would do something different. Wouldn’t everyone, really?

If I knew I was dying in seven days, I would spend the whole week writing every lesson I have learned about life down along with every bit of advice I could think of to give to my kids. They could take it or leave it, but at least someday they would be able to see what their dad might think about some situation that came up. Other than that I would just spend the last week saying goodbye to friends and family.

The second question is unclear. I’m skipping it. If I figure out what it means, perhaps I’ll revisit it later.

For the bonus question:

Goals, if they align with what you like to do, will help you direct your energies each day. If you work daily towards reaching those goals, just putting in the work will improve the present. It is the process of work that is important. You can feel better just by knowing that you dedicated yourself to your craft for that day.

[For an overview of what #Trust30 is, click here]

#Trust30-Day 5

[This is another post for the #Trust30 challenge. More information here.]

If we live truly, we shall see truly. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Today's prompt:

Not everyone wants to travel the world, but most people can identify at least one place in the world they’d like to visit before they die. Where is that place for you, and what will you do to make sure you get there? – Chris Guillebeau, author of The Art of Non-Conformity

It’s a good thing that I can work on this question in the afternoon. I never like to think about travel at night, because usually what follows is several hours of staring at the ceiling, thinking about all the places left in the world to see. I can drink espresso at 10pm and sleep fine, but if someone gets me thinking about adventures abroad, it’s going to be a long night.

Traveling is one of the most enjoyable activities on the face of the earth. When you travel, you get the opportunity to get away from the familiar, the everyday routine. You notice more things. It is like the wonder that a child has as she wanders through a garden. She has to stop and inspect every flower, insect or rock she sees. The world is animated around her and she soaks it all in.

That’s kind of what travel does to me. It refreshes my sense of wonder about the world around me.

You may have experienced something like this too. Walking through an airport or train station, the excitement of adventure starts to creep into your body. You feel as if you are almost floating in a bubble, an unseen force lightening each step as you get closer to the departure area. You are surrounded with thousands of people, all going somewhere, but at the same time you are all alone. Waiting for your departure gives you time to watch the diversity of people around you and create stories in your mind for them. Occasionally, you meet a fellow traveler and find that someone has the same love of travel that you do. Traveling fills you a with a feeling of exhilaration and an inner calm at the same time.

Traveling also helps us remember how big the world is. It reminds us that there are a whole lot more people on this earth than just us. They have hopes and dreams for their futures that are just as real as ours. Traveling helps remind us of our humanity.

Trying to pick a single place to go is a difficult challenge, so I’ll start with a list of places I want to see and try to narrow it down from there. First is South America, a continent I have not yet visited. Brazil and Argentina are at the top of the list. I want to see the beaches of Ipanema and the Amazon and its vast forests. In Argentina, Buenos Aires, the Pampas and the Tierra del Fuego are calling. I would also like to see the Incan ruins in Ecuador, Bolivia or Chile.

Africa is not short of sights to see either. Egypt is my highest priority, for its pyramids and the Nile River. I want to see the savannas of Zambia and Victoria Falls on the Zambezi River, then relax on the beaches of Mozambique.

In Europe, well, there are too many to name (I admit to being a Europhile). Greece and Turkey (yes, most of Turkey is in Asia, but it kind of straddles both continents) are high on the list of to see, though if I could go to Italy or Spain again, I would jump at the chance. I also don’t think that any traveler’s adventures are complete without a trip to St. Petersburg or Moscow.

In the Middle East and Asia, just a few places really catch my interest.  Masdar, Abu Dhabi’s attempt to build a sustainable city in the desert, is one of them. I would also like to see Beirut and maybe Riyadh. Moving farther east, a stop in India is a high priority, as is a stop (or several) in Thailand. Some good friends live there, and they would be able to show me the non-touristy side of the country. It would be a wonderful reunion to see them.

If I could somehow get into North Korea, I would like to see that country too. Visiting a country that has been so isolated from the rest of the world for the last 50 years would be fascinating. I just read Nothing to Envy, by Barbara Demick, and the stories were heart-wrenching. A trip there would give me lots to write about.

Completing the round-the-world wishful tour, I hope to visit Newfoundland, Canada and Mexico City. If I could get to Havana that would be great too. I once took a few voice lessons from a man who had defected from Cuba and he told me that the beaches there are unbelievably beautiful. Havana almost has a mythical status as a place trapped in time. I want to see if the myth in my mind matches reality. In the U.S., I have yet to see Washington, D.C., New Orleans and the Grand Canyon.

Click to read more ...